Thoughts on Tim Russert and Stan Winston (and my cat)

Tim Russert

There's one other post I've done like this, and it was for Peter Jennings. Peter was my favorite, ever for a long time, and his torch of unbiased honesty was carried by very few, and we've increasingly lived through times that have made unbiased objectivity harder and harder to hold onto much less to find. He was Washington's ombudsman, and when comparing all the talking heads of politics... he wasn't one. He spoke with an almost alien efficiency, so many espicially on cable speak in circles and fill time with redundancies and hyperbole. He spoke to either get information, or convey it, expertly at both. I will, as so many, miss him dearly. I didn't know the man personally, but like we all allow so many other, their work becomes a part of our lives. He was the main event of my Sunday morning, usually accompanied by a bowl of ravioli for breakfast.

Stan Winston

As a teen in the late eighties, Stan Winston's name associated with a movie was like a stamp that said "Certified Cool". He cleared the brush off a good chunk of the path to geekdom. Movies he worked on are the movies that non-geeks look at, and think, "They're not so bad." Hell, they're the geek movies that non geeks own, that you can talk about to non-geeks. These people may not know every plot point of the first Terminator, or name the planet in Aliens, but they know what the creatures looked like. He was one of the stars of Starlog and in a pantheon of the guys like Harryhausen, Trumbull, Dykstra, Tippett, and Baker, playing with the coolest fucking job ever, playing with the coolest toys ever.

Tim Russert... Friday.
Stan Winston... and my cat D'Lerium... Sunday.

What a fucking shitty weekend.

D'Lerium
Rest in peace all three.

Redboxed: Juno

Hold on, had a thought here, and I have to figure out it it's plagiarism or a Cliché. Gimmie sec... Googling; "Juno After-school-special"

Hmmm "1 - 10 of about 6,320 for Juno After-school-special. (0.37 seconds)"

Cliché! So.

Now, from scanning the search results there's two clear camps, that it was or was not an After School special. One friend said "lifetime movie".

Either way, Every joke or comment I had heard about this movie was about the use of slang. Aside from the one douche in the opening scene, it was far from as thick as other media made it out to be, so, part of me was a little disappointed that the dialogue sounded so much flatter than I was expecting.

Way to screw a comedy, comedy. Other than that, it made me feel old, when I identified more with the parents than the kids. So, we're done talking now. One other thought; if Jennifer Garner was supposed to be such a bitch, why do we still feel okay with her having the baby? She's going to be a craptastic mother. Awful really. She's one of those dumb fucks who has to re-define their life when ever they believe society mandates it. "Oh, I'm a teen now, I must put away childish things and, I must listen to what is popular, and were this brand make-up, and blow these boys, for it is expected of me." The she gets to college, sleeps with a new guy every three days until she meets "the one" and moves into "We're married now, we're adults. I will read the newspaper (for the first damn time in her life..), attend a church of my choice, and dress... sensibly." These are people who want their life completely dictated by some roadmap society issues. Life, you have my address; my copy got lost ages ago and I've been winging it, but I'd be curious to see all the boring crap I've missed.

C.J. Craig and J. Jonah Jameson should have raised the kid.

Movie: Incredible Hulk

Eight years ago, Ang Lee gave us Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. I loved it, many did, but I had excitedly asked an Asian friend of mine one of those; "Didn't you just love it?" questions. He told me Crouching Tiger was complete shit. CTHD was a bag of the stalest cliche's ever crammed into a asian movie. Then, a few years later, after Hulk, I believed him. The first 20 minutes the last 20 minutes and most parts in between them are some of the worst movie ever... but that's Hulk (2003).

This Hulk, the INCREDIBLE HULK, is awesome. But, I gotta say, the "Too much CG" crowd. They suck as a demographic, they're a bunch of fucktards who don't even know what they're talking about, ever, on anything. I'm not talking about you, I mean that other fuck, the one you don't like. If the sun had just exploded, and one of them said the world was about to end, I'd have doubts, cause one of them said it. If they'd say "I wish the FX were better, what can be done to enhance the beliveability of these CG creatures?" Then they've returned to sanity.

Hulk's FX are a little more quantity than quality, but it's more then good enough. And if you NEED a 10 foot green man to look more believable than this to accept him, your imagination is dead in the corner of your brain. Wait, they're all the same evil pricks who think Aliens don't belong in Indiana Jones... you're the Golgafrincham. The B Ark. This movie ruled. Not Iron Man good. But damn, GET ON THE NEXT HULK MOVIE MARVEL!

Marvel score TWO for TWO... The only perfect studio in Hollywood. Wait does Lucasfilm count???

Movie: Indiana Jones and the Kindom of the Crystal Skull

Wow!

Loved it. Personally, it's my favorite Indy movie after Raiders.

Going to get spoilerriffic here...

SPOILER ZONE.

STOP READING, WAIT TILL AFTER YOU SEE THE MOVIE!

Ok, all clear? Good.
Cause I have NOTHING to do here, but rant about the people who are hating on this movie.

Directed by Steven "Close Encounters of the Third Kind, E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial War of the Worlds, Speilberg. And produced by George "STAR FRAKKING WARS" Lucas! They have this character they trot out from time to time, he goes on great adventures, like with God's box, magic rocks and Oh, Jesus' DIXIE CUP! So, why are aliens WRONG? Fuck, and NO, X-Files and National Treasure comparisons are ridiculous! Yes in both this and Nat-Tres2 They're after a city of Gold.... Gee, same as Road to ElDorado! So what? And theres and alien skull, with Hanger 51 ooooooo X-Filesy... National Treasure wouldn't have been a stain in it's mommy's feminine products without Indy to daddy it into this world. But, really what I can’t get a grip on is that almost the entire fan base of this flick has seen Spielberg do aliens, a lot, and Lucas do aliens, a lot. But in the movie about a guy who goes after an ark filled with ghosts, magical stones and cups o’ immortality, aliens are ridiculous?

So, what other myths are off limits to Indiana Jones? Why are aliens wrong, and Jesus’ accessories are okay?

MAKE MORE INDY MOVIES!

SHIA RULES!

Redboxed: Rush Hour 3.

Thank you. I was wondering why No Country for Old Men won an Oscar. Now I know.

Movie: Speed Racer

First, take a minute here...


Okay, see that? Now, on with...
They have some full episodes on Hulu, a fantastic site!... Every episode of Buck Rogers or the OLD Battlestar Galactica at yer fingertips! Hot DAMN! Anyway, in that intro we see racing, explosions and some primitive bullet time.

This movie has MORE racing with the Mach 6, an invention of the Wachowski's, then it does the Mach 5. It has SMALLER explosions than the cartoon, and NO BULLET TIME.

C'mon, you couldn't have made the opening of the credits of the movie like the cartoon, with a race, HUGE explosion and BULLET TIME, were you afraid the guys who made the first Matrix movie would get so pissed that they finally break out of the locker and crush your skulls for stealing their lives. At least you guys let them make a kick ass V for Vendetta.

So, why the Mach 6 at all? (It looks like you painted the Batmobile white.)

A:? The Mach 5 is a touring car.

Ok, If the Mach 5 is in fact a touring car, then why not have had the plot of the movie center on the middle race. or some larger trans-continental race. Maybe have the Mach-5 be the best car with the best gadgets. Have the villains trying to maybe steal the plans for the Mach 5.

Whatever, my kids loved it. Me... Meh. The Middle was an AWESOME speed racer movie. You could have had something really special if the Mach 5 HAD been something special.

Redboxed: Seeker and Sweeney

The Seeker: The Dark Is Rising
This is my new favorite movie ever and has replaced everything I've ever liked, and the problem with print is you can't hear sarcasm. This is just a Harry Potter knock off based on some Harry Potter knock of book from 1973. Oh. Crap. Uh... Never mind. Why'd you start with the second book? Well. After learning that, I've nothing more to say, other than, the lady who wrote this books, could see the future, and wrote stuff inspired by Harry Potter... twenty years early. We kinda thought the movie was bla...




Then we watched...




Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

How, How the FUCK can anyone sit through THREE hours of this? What did they cut, and why?

Sorry, just did not enjoy this. I love Depp. I usually love Tim Burton (Planet of the Apes... happy for you on the check clearing, but jeeze, that was... not necessary), and the number Epiphany kicked ass!

Actually, after looking through it, this was probably the best Sweeney Todd could be, since all the shit we hated, was the stuff that's usually in the story anyway, but, watching it, first exposure to the story ever, it sucked.

If you had done Cinderella, and I'd never known ANYTHING about Cinderella, I might cry Bullshit on the glass slipper... So Sweeney and crew, have had their feet really cut up by their glass slippers here. Sorry for not feigning worldliness and faking awareness of this thing. I can name Broadway shit like NASCAR shit... I live in St. Louis and we're not NASCAR or Broadway types...

Note: The spell checker will underline Broadway with a lower case "b", but doesn't know what NASCAR is. (it recommends spelling it PASCAL)

Movie: Iron Man

Iron Man
Is all about Thor. From the last line of the film, and if you left before the credits were over, sorry... this movie is all about Thor. Thor is not in this movie, mentioned in this movie... hinted to exist in this movie. Thor is nowhere but the slate of Marvel movies for 2009... along with Captain America and the Avengers.
Thor's MUCH more important than Iron Man.
See... The Avengers have been eternally a... LESS than interesting Super-Group, and this comes from a guy with the whole run of West-Coast Avengers. They're like the Justice Leauge whenever someone does a stupid Justice League without Superman Batman and Wonder Woman. Captain America is usually their biggest character...

Okay, lets difine size of a character: Growing up in the 70's/80's Spider-Man had a cartoon, Hulk had a Live action Show... BOTH of those chartacters had the other (cartoon and live action show) and Captain America had.. a motorcycle helmet. Superman and Batman were BIGGER characters. Espically Superman. And Wonder-Woman had a TV Show too.

So, as older people, Marvel's line up may seem to be second-tier characters, but, they don't HAVE to be. With the animated movies and the features, the tiers are collapsing, and shaking into new strata. My son LOVES Doctor Strange. Never read the comic, only saw the DVD movie. But that was enough. Iron Man will be above Wonder Woman in the Super-Hero pantheon by the end of the summer, and no longer a second tier character.

That's why it's all about Thor. Marvel's debut making the movies of their characters has taken the genre back to school, just by GIVING A SHIT!!!!!!!

This is what a spandex comic book movie can be like just by caring? Look at that poster, it looks like an old Wizard magazine mock up. Marvel is giving us Fanboy dreams!!!! But, even though their first outing was.... straight to the head of the class... it's all about Thor now.

You can make a wise ass Armored man cool... easy. Captain America, you could probably do in your sleep.... don't, but it doesn't seem hard when done by professionals... but how do you make Thor cool as Iron Man?

That's the test of your new studio Marvel. Not because Thor is some fav character of mine, he's far from it... really he's a tad... he's not the flavor I would chose. Okay, he's one of my least favorite marvel characters. So. Make me like him. Keep him from being lame. Please Make the weakest link in the Avengers line-up just as strong as Iron Man. Cause, with one line from Nick Fury, It's now all about Thor.

Went to return Charlie Wilson and I found...

Cloverfield
This wonderful Sci-Fi epic spoke to me. I mean, other sci-fi epics have given us lightsabers, FTL drives, flying cars, robots that look like Sean Young (fully functional )...
Wait... Okay, Can you fuck a replicant? Or did it just work since Deckard was a replicant? I mean, if it's fully functional with her girl parts, then THAT is the most impressive piece of Sci-Fi technology, but... oh, and communicators, and the Holo-deck on Star Trek. There are so many pieces of fantastic gear in Sci-Fi, but this... This camera is AMAZING!!!!

An HD camera with an amazing battery life, that's that durable, and has the easiest to clean lens EVER!!! Awesome Camera, and the light on it, barely even hurts the battery life, as in, no worries. It even has Infrared in some of the best quality I've ever seen, and the on camera mic, RECORDS IN DTS 6.1!!!!!! Awesome! I WANT this camera! Make it REAL!

I liked the movie too, except the cartoonish leaning building. All the other buildings crumbled, except that one, it was being held up by Jesus. Note to Jesus. Next time, hold the building with one hand, and kill the fucking monster with the other.

PLEASE MAKE A CLOVERFIELD 2.

Redboxed: Charlie Wilson and Sentinel

The Sentinel
Sledge Hammer, 24, Desperate Housewives, The Streets of San Fransisco... Yea for TV! The plot... this was Minority Report without any cool future tech.... It's an old movie, but, I had thought about seeing it... Okay, last night, I was trying, TRYING to rent movies, nobody else in the family would want to watch, I mean bore fests to everyone but me. How best to do that, pick movies with Washington / political backdrops. Plus I kinda liked the Irony of watching a Washington movie written by Arron Sorkin, plus a Micheal Douglas around / near the White House movie combo. Kinda recreating the Nate and Hayes accident of renting Micheal Clayton and No Country for Sucky Movie. So, when it all comes down to it, Sentinel's title barely even makes any sense, but Why, in this movie, and we've all seen this one a billion times... why does the framed good guy always steal a car? Why? You're innocent of anything and EVERYTHING you could go to jail for, and you STEAL A CAR, and it's never brought up EVER again!!!! He's an auto thief now! It won't come up again, but it happens in every version of this stamped out script. And this was based on a novel! It probably had to be just to clear itself of being based on 10,000 scripts just like it. The old friends with a falling out investigating each other? Why if you're a character as young as Sutherland's would you be buddies with, Mr. "took a bullet for Reagan." Micheal Douglas can't have any, ANY aquaintences without non-related speaking parts. He's so OLD, they give him Depends, but, a long time ago, he was best buds with the young guy... BULLSHIT! This is a swell, and handsome guy, shit, it's even part of the plot that everyone likes him, so why doesn't he have a base of friends that he doesn't work with (who he could have borrowed a car from?)... BULLSHIT. These characters lives are too small to fill the screen...

Oh look, it's
Charlie Wilson's War
A nomination for Philip Seymour Hoffman. No writing, no Julia Roberts, no picture, just a nom for Hoffman. And that piece of shit NCFOM, won a shopping cart full. Fuck that. BTW, look at that piece of shit poster. Who decided to paste Philip Seymour Hoffman onto the poster like he's some psychotic voyeur? Let's play Where's Seymour? He and his character are great in the flick, it's just, damn that looks bad on the poster.

I just don't have many words when I love a movie, and this one kicked ass. Smart, relevant, educational, superbly done... most people would hate it, well, I'm cynical that way.

Downey to reprise role as Iron Man in Iron Man!!!!

Wildly Popular 'Iron Man' Trailer To Be Adapted Into Full-Length Film

On youtube...

A blog is a handy way to keep a collection of youtube videos you like, without having a page on youtube... I guess I'm lazy....

Redboxed... A number of movies....

30 Days of Night
First, I forgot to mention when we rented it, Nothing really to say... Nice solid flick, I'll remember you fondly.... Okay, I rented this one like a week or two ago... The four movies we/I've watched in the past 36 hours are below, and I just finished No Country for Old Men. Right before that, we watched Hitman. Oddly, Michael Clayton is the movie on my mind more than the others.... BUT, one thing; this was quite unintentional, I'm a fan of the movie Nate and Hayes, I won't say I'm a big fan of it, since size is relative, and well I only know one other person who knows of the movies existence, and owns the DVD... So, he's the big fan of Nate and Hayes... I'll wait till it's on Blue Ray I guess... Anyway, Nate and Hayes, was a WONDERFUL pirate movie With Tommy Lee Jones (No Country for old Men) and Michael O'Keefe... Who I had no idea he was in Michael Clayton! The poster to the left here is jealous I'm not even talking about... What;s to say, you're okay 30 days... I liked you, but don't be clingy... our relationship was a one night stand, no late fees.




Oddly enough, All of these were returned a day late...

Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium
Is a lovely movie. Not just because Natalie Portman's in it. She helps. But it's good to see a movie like this. "Family" movies that talk down to no one, but don't wink at the adults constantly are all but non-existent. My son wanted to see this movie, and I'm elated he did, since the trailers made it look like pure crapola. Part of that is just the reputation of the usual attapt at a movie like this is a eye burning hell hole that you beg be taken from you mind. Wow, one worked. If we were to say, hypothetically, that Dustin Hoffman had very few films he could be proud of, I'd say then he should be proud of this one... he had chemistry with everything... Hew had more chemistry with a dishwasher in this movie than most romantic leads have with everything that ever romanced them on screen. This movie is well... I need to save some thought on it later, this thing is ammo in the gun against a movie that was UNFORGIVABLE. It's one of the three below, and it's pure SHIT.





Michael Clayton
An Michael Clayton is FAR from pure shit. I'd been looking forward to this one. If you like a dry almost boring movie... I'm being fair here, I didn't find it boring, but it's not... It's... It's not artsy. So, it's ... "dramatic?" maybe. Suspensful? Kinda. I started this movie at like 2:30, just to see how interesting it might be, to look forward to watching the next day folding laundry. Yes, I was going to fold laundry to Michael Clayton. Well, I couldn't find a place to stop it. Damn, and it LOST Best Picture to No Country for Old Men... Oh, I was exited then!!!!!!!!!!! This was solidly good... Ok, It's not great. The ending is great, the slice of life feal is expertly done, and I'll never rewatch it ever again... Once everthing's unfolded, well... But it was a good view.



Only two movies are left on this little list... one is PURE SHIT. One won BEST Picture.. So, COME HERE!

Hitman and No Country for Old Men

Hitman.... HITMAN... You..... (Imagine Ryan Seacrest trturing these two movies...) Hitman, you're based on a Videogame from 2000! No Counrty for Old Men, you're based on a 2005 novel. Hitman, you've won NO AWARDS, and had a worldwide gross of $98,008,597. No Country for Old Men.... you won FOUR Oscars including BEST PICTURE! and had a worldwide Gross of $134,235,551!!!

Hitman. you...

are...

Safe. No Country for Old Men, you're... I'm Sorry, Those awards must have been make up sex for The Big Lebowski. I love the Coen Brothers, and I can't remotely understand what anyone sees in this movie... (spoiler alert) YOU HAVE NO ENDING! You have the forensics team from Basic Instinct. You're supposed to be SOOOOOOOOOOOO Real, but no one goes into shock... Nothing in this movie makes sense. It's...
hold on, lemme calm down here... I'll try to be polite, you're very overrated... Stardust and 300 get nothing, and you win all these awards... I shouldn't be surprised, Beowulf wasn't even Nominated, those asinine penguins were. I swear those Oscars MUST say, "The Dude ABIDES!!!"

Spider-Man 3, I'm sorry, you're NOT the worst movie of the year. In my heart, it will forever be No Country for Old Men. No Country, you rooted yourself in the real world, and well, seemed... I'll admit, it's a neat idea to have McGyver as the villian, but seriously, why the hell even BOTHER with Woody Harrelson character... He did NOTHING!!! The guy in the building... also USELESS. It all felt so artsy for the sake of artsy, I expected it to be an M. Night Shyamalan film. No ending, like the Soprano's WHAT A TWIST!

Redboxed: Dragonlance

Took me a while to get to this one, I was trying to find art for it. Then a friend sent me some.... Wow, this one was all about wishful thinking. Looking across the geekscape, were in Shangri-La right now... You can't look at that Last poster for Iron Man, and not think to yourself... "I'm dreaming." I'm not a huge fan of Iron Man by any means, I really enjoy the character, but he's one of these marvel B-Lister's... Marvel B-Lister: EVERY Marvel Character With their own title who's not Spider Man, X-Men or Hulk. Iron Man's just some B-List character, The poster looks like the type Wizard magazine used to always put together... or it looks like a poster like you'd see in Last Action Hero or the video store in Lost World. Golden Compass, 300, there was a time that movies like these, we knew we'd never see in the theater... Now they're a common occurrence... We're so far into geek heaven, we're getting Indiana Jones... No, we're farther than that, we're getting a REAL sequel to Heavy Metal!

On the Home Video fromnt, We've had GREAT movies from Iron Man Doctor Strange, we've seen Superman Doomsday... Superman Doomsday, a storyline I really didn't like, somehow became a DVD I really enjoyed. Add to that Justice League New frontier...
And Dragonlance is the old type of "Get the shaft and accept the crap geek!

This is my nightmare of what happened to this movie:
An incompetent Buisnessjerkwad wakes up in the morning, He thinks to himself; "Fuck you NERD, I went to Buisnesstechnical-prep school, I spent 19 months getting wasted on beer in the Philippines, beating people like you over the head I don't care how much you hate me, cause we, WE RULE THE WORLD!!! Now, I have to go have some executive decision over yer fucking Nerd Flick Dragonlance, Lick my shitty asshole you fucking Nerd! Movies for virgins, film at eleven! FUCKING GEEKS. Oh the movie, do as little as possible, dirty T-shirt fat slobs in their mother's basements will buy it anyway... they'll bitch about it online, generating enough word of mouth to other nerds that we'll make more on the second one, no matter how shitty this virgin Night-lite is!" Like 2 minutes after that meeting, he was calling his IT department to fix his blackberry, since the important shit he needed to get to was his fantasy football scores... what a nerd... I hate that guy! Not only that, but, this movie must have had a budget of the change in my Vacuum cleaner, and was a complete disappointment. Mr. Buisnessjerkwad is who I'll blame.

Or I'll have to go on some disrespectful rant about how each of the characters are exactly for LOTR... Oh F-- it... I couldn't even find the DVD cover art for a few months...

Redboxed: D-War and 3:10 to Yuma

Dnag, took me a few days to get around to this one, or these two I should say. Anyway, Dragon Wars... So, from my understanding, It's like the Korean Jerry Sienfeld said to a studio, hey I want to make the biggest budget movie this country has ever made, and I'm writing it, directing it, and forming my own effects studio, and they let him. Okay... It'd never EVER happen over here, and this might be a cautionary tale as to why... The action is beautiful... but oh my, this film doesn't even feel done. It's like the lions share of FX were complete, and they removed the "SCENE MISSING" Frames and let it go out. It's an awesome effort! But it's a bad movie. A very fun bad movie... which by the end of it, when you can't take any more, the ending was very cool, and then the credits just... roll... SCENE MISSING. So, I take that back, it's not a bad movie, it's a Collection of shots, with some scenes, dialouge, A GREAT score, and um... yea, it's NOT A MOVIE. I did get a feel for the story, it wasn't told, it's something you piece together while holding a fart in, or picking your nose.

Then there's 3:10 to Yuma. Yes it's the best western since Unforgiven. I can't think of many westerns since then, but, this is one of the best movies I've ever seen, that included cowboy hats. Okay, I liked it alot... and now I'm bored of typing.

Movie: I am Legend SPOILER RANT

I need to rant, a spoiler filled therapy rant. I've been waiting for ... damn ages, lemme see well over 10 years. Wikipedia says 1994, Hell it may be longer, but maybe that's about right. I've been so SO looking forward to this movie... and to quoute my friend who saw it with me...

"The movie died with the dog."

This thing was GREAT, the whole first half, I was loving and loving... This is not a case of "I was expecting too much" "Waiting so long got my hope up" All that expectation PAID OFF, at first. The hunting in the mustang, the flashbacks to the evacuation of New York, even the dogs walking in line with the sun... This thing was all but perfect.. Fuck it, The opening audio, the BIG idea of the viral cure for cancer, IT WA S PERFECT.

The that woman shows up... Fine. Another survivor... Well, not the LAST MAN ON EARTH after all... fine... wait God and Butterflies.... GOD AND BUTTERFLIES!!!! Bullshit!

So, if they're supposed to survive the hand grenade... In the thing, where thay said there was enough room.... GET IN, TOSS THE GRENADE, and LIVE!!!!!!!!

AND IT ENDS WITH A THOMAS KINCADE BIT OF SCENERY. He wasn't LEGEND, he didn't MATTER!!!! He didn't even matter. YOU RUINED THIS STORY. Screw this movie.

Why, WHY did you have to put that ending on it. I've NOTHING against him dying, but it needs to make sense. Other survivors... The RATS are infected. The disease has the rat population, that 10 foot wall in Vermont does nothing for them.. There was military there, why weren't they broadcasting!?!?!?!?!?!?

AND HOW DID THAT BITCH DRIVE ACROSS THE LACK OF BRIDGES. Did her car, Bery CLEAN car, SWIM to Manhattan?

This was PERFECT, and then it died with the dog.

BTW, Spider-Man 3 says THANKS!

Huckabee Hates stars of I Heart Huckabees?

I haven't seen the movie I Heart Huckabees, but, apparently Gov. Mike Huckabee hates it. Not only that, he said it was the worst movie ever made, and he hated the cast, or said they should never work again... So I guess he hates...

Jason Schwartzman. (Jason Schwartzman was in Marie Antoinette (2006) with Rip Torn
Rip Torn was in Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004) with Chuck Norris)

Isabelle Huppert. (Isabelle Huppert was in Heaven's Gate (1980) with Kai Wulff
Kai Wulff was in Top Dog (1995) with Chuck Norris)

Dustin Hoffman. (Dustin Hoffman was in Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium (2007) with Jason Bateman Jason Bateman was in Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004) with Chuck Norris)

Lily Tomlin. (Lily Tomlin was in Krippendorf's Tribe (1998) with Stephen Root (I)
Stephen Root (I) was in Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004) with Chuck Norris)

Jude Law. (Jude Law was in Cold Mountain (2003) with John Bridson (II)
John Bridson (II) was in Top Dog (1995) with Chuck Norris)

Mark Wahlberg. (Mark Wahlberg (I) was in Shooter (2007) with Alan C. Peterson
Alan C. Peterson was in Hitman, The (1991) with Chuck Norris)

Naomi Watts. (Naomi Watts was in Ring Two, The (2005) with Gary Cole (I)
Gary Cole (I) was in Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004) with Chuck Norris)

Angela Grillo. (Angela Grillo was in Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) with Ben Stiller, Ben Stiller was in Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004) with Chuck Norris)

Oh, last name.... Ger Duany was in I Heart Huckabees (2004) with Bob Gunton
Bob Gunton was in Missing Pieces (1991) with Bernie Kopell
Bernie Kopell was in Cutter, The (2005) with Chuck Norris...

So this movie is basically as close to Chuck Norris as you are, way to go! You come off being everyones friend, but everyone in this movie has worked with people who have worked with Chuck Norris, that means they're like the people who work for YOU! So, by hating people who made I Heart Huckabee's... and thereby, BETRAYING your precious Chuck Norris :( You've implied you HATE people who work with people who worked with Chuck Norris... Your own staff. Shame on you, for shaming Chuck.

You're lucky, Lucky Chuck Norris doesn't cry Gov Huckabee, cause that might have done it...

Movies: Meet the Robinsons and Next

Really not much to say here, no reason, just not woth the time to ramble on. Meet the Robinsons' I'll be buying you... by the way, you were WAY better than that damn rat movie. Next, Critics were a little hard on you, we sorta enjoyed you, but DAMN, maybe, MAYBE that was because the DVD menu screamed, I say SCREAMED "THIS MOVIE WILL SUCK, EJECT IT, BREAK THE DISC!!!" Come on, Transfomers had one of the most beautiful menu screens EVER. This, people make Home video DVD's for grandparents with more compelling menu's... Christ! When I saw the menu, I apologized for having rented a turd, I'm not kidding. But, this movie wasn't bad, not a big thinking movie... special features to PUKE ON... The promotional behind the scenes talking about how great everyone is... They SUCK, leave them off. That goes for all movies, even the turds... speaking of shit and Next... There's an FX shot at the end, that will be laughed at by CG teachers at community classes all across the country. They even say in the featurette that it was last minute... and did not look anywhere close to the rest of the movie, hell, the guys who did the shot, probably wished it had been cut... and we'd know if they had if the movie had any good features. Oh well.

Movie: AVPR

WOW!!!! What a debut for essentially a creative team that I'd never heard of! Thank you Thank you! Please, PLEASE make the next one as kick ass if not Ass-kickier! Oh, My son is looking forward to the next like 7 AVP movies. You guys now have a generation thinking this is better than James Cameron! It's not. Bless your heart for trying, and for making the best Alien film since Aliens, and the best Predator one since the original.

***Please mention in the DVD commentary if Lt. Woods was a Battletech reference!!!!!!***

Damn, this was FUN. More, I say MORE movies should be like this!

I Sooooooooooooooooooooo hope now that National Treasure and I am Legend are as fun!

Shit, I read what I typed above and I sound like a 10 year old girl in 1990... gross me out.

Movie: The Astronaut Farmer

I wasn't going to blog about this one...
And, after typing it, I deleted it. In America, we're not allowed opinions anymore, no one is. Kinda sad really. I really empathized with this guy, and well, what a sad world we live in.

Think we're allowed opinions?

Putin is Time's Man of the Year! Because Al Gore is to much to the left... Someone ruined our country.

Yea, Dear Time, Quit having whatever of the year anymore. "You" was LAME... and Putin, well, let's hope that one isn't as regrettable as it could be.... Way to go.

Seriously, a former Presidential Candidate wins and Oscar and a Nobel Prize in the same year, and he's not person of the year? WTF?

If you'd seen this movie, my rant may make more sense... screw it. The internet is a lousy for of self expression.

Movies: Underdog, Knocked Up and The Man From Earth!!!

I squeezed in 3 tonight... and don't really want to say a damn thing about them, which is a shame, since I keep this for myself, and my initial reactions to look back on, like my daughter's scrapbook's things, this is my movie watching scrapbook...
Underdog, the kids loved it, they'll deny it one day. It's that good, they'll deny how bad it really is. My wife HATED Knocked Up... So much so that I almost wanted to defend it... but, I DON'T CARE, UNDERDOG, KNOCKED UP.... So What...
Last night, I saw Stardust... and tonight The Man From Earth... These types of films are bad for me, they make me crave the next hit, DAMN, I want another fix of discovery, a fix of goodness unseen, I could watch a dozen movies. City of God did this, I went on a two month DVR bender of every movie I could fit on the thing. But I need to get things done and to work. Podcasts may be replaced, I should just sit the portable at my desk while I work.... Oh Man, two movie highs in two nights! Happiness! I wish the wife had watched Man From Earth with me, I'll have to BUY IT... and you should to.

Movies: Simpsons and Stardust.

Well, one movie makes fun of me for being a sucker for paying to see it in a theater, and the other one makes the world feeling like suckers for spending so much time in theaters with Spider-Man 3, and not it! So, to Simpsons, I say, I well spent a dollar. And we, sort of enjoyed, but Stardust had us not remembering what movie we watched before it.

Dear Stardust, I wanted REALLY wanted to see you in a theater. I'll blame myself, I could never blame you. I didn't look hard enough. We were on vacation, not a theater anywhere near those parts, no cell phones or internet either. It seems you were gone, or at least gone to the small screens that punish you for not seeing it opening weekend. I'm glad you found love from audiences abroad, it warms my heart. In an odd way, this is how I thought I may react to The Golden Compass... and while no critic I read compared compass to you, you were surely in their heart. You are NOT The Princess Bride. But, you're just as classic and lovable. I hope you grow into peoples hearts and collections...

Okay, crushing on a movie here... but most movies have the wife and I lounging, some get us sitting up or leaning forward... this had us sitting like Lady and the Tramp, and by the end I couldn't speak, I would have LOST it, and I mean, as in...

I.E.

BONES

"You'll flood the whole compartment!"

That line is from Star Trek II, a CLASSIC movie. You know it before you even walk out of the theater. Stardust, joins the Pantheon of movies.

Movie: The Golden Compass

How can a movie, open at #1, make 20 MILLION MORE than the #1 movie the previous year and be panned for under performing?

Is it; Gee, this movie must be on the wrong side of a whole bunch of idiots made up fucking culture war, or Well Narnia was Christian, and Compass is Atheist so this PROVES Christian movies are BIGGER and BETTER...

You know what? There may be even a million or so people in this country who CARE about that issue who hate people for feeling different things, but I'll be the ONLY person, maybe to give a good reason WHY Compass got 40 Million LESS than Narnia in opening...
Narnia was MUCH more heavily promoted, and had a book series parents may have read as a child. Compass didn't have as old of a book series, Spiderwick is going to have this same issue, as is Inkheart. But the biggest thing is getting those toys in happy meals. Robert Rodriguez credits getting in the McDonald's happy meals with Spy Kids success. You have to have a good movie to back it up, but New Line apparently didn't have 10 minutes for a 10 minute film school on any of his DVD's... (Oh, I believe that's on the Once upon a time in Mexico DVD, could be mixed up, but I think that's where it is...)

Enough about their pathetic business stuff! This flick gave me CLOCKWORK, Airships, Nicole Kidman (WAIT.....!)

Nicole Kidman?

You can't blame Atheism or the Fantasy Genre on any ANY of this movies failings!!!! She's box office POISON. Her highest grossing movie is Happy Feet..... HAPPY FEET! I didn't even remember her being in HAPPY FEET!!! This explains why I thought during the moive, "Sigh, Nicole Kidman's finally in a good movie!" Gee, Nicole Kidman, and No HAPPY MEAL... What were you THINKING!!!!

Anyway, Clockwork Technology, Airships, Nicole Kidman in a good movie, Daniel Craig, OKAY, just a GREAT CAST, Armored Polar Bears....

BY THE WAY...... I LOT of theaters are in Malls now, they tend to be relocating to them, This WEEKEND on the movie calender sucks... I'm one of those people, and there are A LOT of us, who do their holiday shopping, whenever, we're usually 80% done by Thanksgiving. I've been avoiding malls. They're impossible to park at... Oh and Weather SUCKED this weekend.

Armored POLAR BEARS. I drank a COKE! It's that good. Good enough to drink a Coke During. It's not Sparta or my friend Optimus Prime. It's a First part, not a stand alone movie, but that could be a WONDERFUL way to have a trilogy be.

The TALK of the net, the Speed Racer Trailer....

The first 30 seconds of this trailer may be the finest trailer ever!!!
But, as my 5 year old pointed out.... "THERE's a 6. That's NOT the MACH 5!" Back this up.... You've made a LIVE action SPEED RACER MOVIE, the first one. And wanted to be a living version of the cartoon, groundbreaking if not for the visual style of the Flintsdtones movies, but you'll fly in the face of that... You'll even cast John Goodman!!! You take all that risk, but we're not getting the Mach 5????? It looks like Speed gets a "BETTER" Car in this movie, The Mach 6 maybe????

A geeky conversation may go like this; "Which car would you want in a race? The Mach 5, Tracks from transformers, Bumblebee, or K.I.T.T?" "Bumblebee from the Bay movie?" "Yea, yea, that one..." The underlying questionis, which car is better than the Mach 5? BUT, in SPEED RACER, no car is supposed to be bettter than the Mach 5.

So if you made Doctor Who, would The Doctor accept a replacement for The Tardis?????????

So if you made Star Wars, would Han Solo accept a replacement for Millenium Falcon?????????

Roy Rogers wouldn't replace Trigger!

Roy Rogers would have made a better Speed Racer movie.....


HOW THE HELL COULD YOU!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?


I apologize, but this trailer called for a tantrum!

Education is important, so please practice your alphabet.

Best / worst movies of the year noms so far....

Lessee, movies I've seen this year, from this year....

Pathfinder (Damn phat!!!)
Epic Movie (dumb)
TMNT (cool)
Beowulf (Not great... BUT Very good)
Bridge to Terabithia (We have other names for this thing, whose name does not deserve to be spoken)
Ghost Rider (Best Ghost Rider Movie EVER!)
Blades of Glory (Ugh, but I LOVE the North Korean Video)
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (Likey, me likey...)
Live Free or Die Hard (Meh....)
Ratatouille (The movie whose name will not be spoken snds you it's regards, from Hell you piece of Rat shit!)
300 (THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Spider-Man 3 (THIS IS SHIT!!!!!!!!!!)
Shrek the Third (replace hi with u)
Transformers (Just PRIME)
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (Ran out of steam a movie short of a trilogy... you FUCKS, could have given us ANYTHING for the underworld, and we got SAND!!!, could have done that on no budget in the 60's for TV! I paid 60 buck to take the family to this turd, and you give me SAND, SCREW YOU!)
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Worst Potter movie yet, and still a solid for the year...)
Golden Compass (Wonderful)
Simpsons (Funny, very funny, A year from now I'll forget everything in it!)
Stardust (I'm almost romantically in love with this movie, and I can say that the week I got BLADE RUNNER on DVD... Pinch me... Is it more loveable than Blade Runner.... Not a fair question....)
Underdog (Ugh!)
Knocked Up (Matt and I shall ARGUE)
The Man From Earth (Make room in the pantheon boys, this one's comin up!)
The Astronaut Farmer (Good, but probably not a contender)
AVPR (Wow!!!!!!!!!!!! That GOOD Movie!!!!)

Should We be on the list?
Invincible Iron Man (AWESOME)
Doctor Strange (Just as great as Iron Man)
Superman Doomsday (A DAMN FINE SUPERMAN Flick)
Blade Runner : Final Cut (Most years you were re-released, you deserved a best picture oscar... you're one of the finest pieces of anything ever shot on file, and when I was 7 years old TOLD me I loved brunettes, large rooms, slanted buildings flying cars, detectives in trenchcoats, and SO MUCH more... Blade Runner you gave me Cyberpunk and Anime, notably Akira... I love you so too...)


Hope to see before the end of the year;
I am Legend (16 YEARS of waiting!!!!!)
National Treasure 2

Movie : Beowulf

Just saw this in IMAX 3D... They did a helluva job making the oldest story in the language seem almost fresh... okay hold on.
I'm not going to say one thing about the CG, the 3D, the mocap... none of the, it's a movie, and, see, I can't think of ever hearing bitching about how SHITY the animation is in Snow White!
Snow White, the OLD Disney one looks like ASS. Disney wouldn't let a TV show look like that today, That cow movie had better animation, 50 years from now, that cow movie, won't be a Trivial Pursuit question, Snow White will still be pushing product and be adored. It's a sentimental relic of the birth of theatrical animation, and gets forgiven.
I love, LOVE the movie Heavy Metal, not even every segment, but enough that I LOVE the movie. God, I would love for it to be remade, with the tech today, and make the paintings and art from the original stories come to life! It's be AWESOME. I need a new blog, just of requests of movies.... Mmmmmmmm, dear Hollywood, Would you? Anyway, anyone talking about how the movie was done, might risk sounding full of themselves. To keep this simple; Beowulf movies suck SO bad, the best one took a different name, this is a close second, and still proud to keep the name, so that makes it the BEST (Beowulf movie, named Beowulf!)

Civilization is in full collapse...

I saw this ad on this series of tubes...


I'm not that big on New York, it's traffic is the thing of nightmares, heck to me 270 northbound from 6am to 9:30 ish is nightmarish, so I'm clearly not New York stock, but...

New York's claim to fame is it inspired Bee Movie? That's all New York ever did? That's what all the hype's been about? History, sports, people, gee I guess all of that was NOTHING compared to inspiring BEE MOVIE!

Congratulations to all of New York, you're not a small town anymore, you've inspired a MOVIE!
I guess the guy in Antz must have wasted his life... cause he didn't make BEE MOVIE! ugh...

A cause I can blog behind.

B B B BUCK!

A while back my friend Matt told me the Buck Rogers theme had lyrics... I had no idea that the opening credits were so.... BRILLIANT.

Okay I'm a Halo fan now....

I just saw well, this,

And now I'm a fucking Halo fan.
I don't own a 360, and won't until the Morlocks have sounded an all clear on that ring of death thing. I don't own Halo 1 or 2, borrowed them from fans and couldn't get into them. I was however burnt out on FP Shooters when Doom 2 came out. But I love movies, My favorite genre is space... I'm the guy hanging out at Cowboy Feng's thinking;
Riddick bombed, Starship Troopers was a one night stand, and now Halo is the new chick at the end of the bar, I'm sitting down my beer, and telling you my wingman, that I'm in love. I want to walk up to the Halo movie and buy it a drink right now, and hope to have a threesome (trilogy) with it!

Very neat stuff going on...

http://www.fotowoosh.com/ Is doing some niftys....

Movie: Transformers

Oh..... wow, I soooooo didn't hate this movie, I think it's love, but who want's to rush into a huge commitment like that. This is a movie that is a 5out of 5 and guilty of not being an 8 out of 5. It's the Mona Lisa holding a Cocktail glass or having a yellow umbrella in the background. It's not Episode I.

I won't bitch about flames on Optimus... I loved the way he looked. Fanboys who bitched about the flames or other small things 'destroying Prime or their Childhood, don't forget that Hasbro at one point tuned him into Optimus Primal and he was originally a bat, a cheap stupid bat. So, a paint job will not kill yer childhood.

Why wasn't this movie more mythic, more character driven, why couldn't the action had less blurry moving camera blur? Are all women in their universe former Victoria secret models?

Oh, if I have spoilers... if you haven't seen the movie already, you don't care enough about Transformers to feel it spoils anything.

Let's see..... quickie thoughts....

Megatron tosses a car. That's just one instance of human life being piss in this movie, the Decepticons tear through people like a natural disaster, and human life has never felt cheaper. Buckets of dead... and if you tear through a bus, Prime will CUT YOUR HEAD OFF!

Captain or Sargent Lennox... The guy with the baby, should have been named Fairborne, and his daughter should have been named Marissa. Though I'm now cool with the Sam Mikela thing for the most part, they wasted about a billion chances in this movie to make G.I. Joe a Transformers spinoff.

They seeded so many great things in this for the BEST Sequels EVER....

Galvatron, We'll all be happy if he doesn't go by Megatron anymore. and killing Starscream would be nice, but Starscream has to become leader the moment before his murder. SO MAKE HIM GALVATRON!!!!

Jetfire, who says Megatron came to earth alone?

Quintessons: Damn, they'd be like the aliens in the 2001 series, throwing cosmic geometry everywhere, but instead of spreading sapience they're spreading chaos, which is a perfect way of creating demand for their products!

Dinobots: Chuck that fragment of the Allspark, which can probably become another Allspark, onto some Animatronic dinosaurs, then have Grimlock fighting Prime until Grimlock realizes he's not evil.

Bruticus: Starscream should raise his own army, and announce himself their supreme commander, then, well, I refer back to the Galvatron thing.

This was in no way disappointing, but I wish they'd realize what they have here. Transformers could have been a holy trilogy. They're off on the wrong foot for it to be up with Rings and Star Wars, but they're close, and some out of the park sequels could put transformers in the pantheon, rather than in the loser set of Spider-Man (Third one blew it...) Matrix (take after Jaws, never acknowledge your sequels), and Pirates (You're not as bad off as some other trilogies, time will tell if you join the Pantheon, you're in trilogy purgatory with "The Prequel Trilogy" and The Godfather...)

So Bay, and Spielberg, do you want to make a series of films that have good opening days, or do you want a series so LOVED that we'll need to buy a boxed set for every new format down the road... So even 100 years from now, "Oooo, Transformers Trilogy Memory Crystals, 11,000 Dollars at Best Circuit Buy City - Mart, those are a MUST!!!"

Movie : Spider-Man 3

Hey, the lenticular print of this poster is great. nice depth, good clarity, the size makes it a striking wall piece... I'd buy it... maybe... I really like the poster, and Spiderman, and I'm in the hater camp of this movie.
That's such a stupid and strong word to throw onto a fucking movie. How could I "hate" this movie, if a movie is actually hateable, you're probably of the good fool sense to avoid seeing it in the first place.
Was this a waste of a third part to a perftly entertaining series? Well, I'm a "Hater" of this movie, my feelings are basiclly off the shelf agreement with almost anyone else who loves comic book movies and


Update: 11-26-07 I hated this trash so much I never posted my thoughts.

Back to Blogging....

Eh, I'm not sure why, it's not like anyone but people who know or knew you read anyones blogs anyway, and complete strangers, and that's a little freaky... So I'll treat it for what it is, a pad of paper, in a trashcan, next to everyones desk. BTW, why are you looking in this trashcan? Next can over has the pack of smokes that had one left, and that phone number you lost is in the trash that was taken out already.

Why blog again, in a world where no one is allowed to truly say anything? I don't know... but it doesn't stop me from feeling like I'm ready to pop. But in the world of trivial culture, it is the Summer movie season. With most summer fare beggin to be family events, I've been DREADING it in a way... I HATE, HATE spending money on going to the movies. I love going, I used to go every week at least!!!, but multiply that cost by four, and it hurts a little...

So, what's been the year so far in movies: Siderman Forever and Caribbean Trek 3: The Search for Jack deserve their own posts.

To catch up, some quick thoughts on some oldies:

Ghost Rider
I love comics, duh, I'm not enamored with hero books so much anymore, continuity... feeling lost, changes from back in the day, but I'm getting over some of those and if I hear good about one I'll give it a chance. Most superhero comics never get a diffinative story, they're stuck in the concept stage for hundreds of issues. Ghost Rider is one of those comics, I never felt what his story was, he was a dude on a bike with his head on fire... In the early nineties I loved the book for Mark Texeira's art and a truly bad ass bike.
Going into the movie, I have about the same relationship to the material as I did Blade, and I walked out very happy. I get the impression the movie wasn't we received, and I can't figure out why... What could you possibly think you were going to get from a movie about Nicholas Cage with his skull on fire. Think about this; Ghost Rider made over 4 times what Gridhouse made, and was exactly what Grindhouse wanted to be, a B-Movie from the 1970's. Ghost Rider has always been that, and when that's what you want and expect from a movie, it's really enjoyable.



and....

300
A summer blockbuster walks up to King Leonidas, it's a bigger movie, it'll make more money, It's always had more hype, but in terms of quality... A boot lands on this blockbuster's chest pushing it into a pit as the last words it'll hear are "This... is... SPARTA!!!"

I love seeing a Graphic novel come to life in this way, what fucking genius thought not to reinvent the damn wheel when putting this shit on the screen??? Why did this approach take so long!!! Far from every comics property deserve this, and 300 wasn't at the top of my list, but Watchmen, is purdy close to the Top. I hope, so so so hop DC is willing to let Warner Brother maybe somehow negotiate the rights to another Frank Miller work and give it this treatment. I know if I were an exec at Warner Bros, I'd find out who owns DC comics, and buy the rights to Batman the Dark Knight returns, and get Zack Snyder making it right after Watchmen.

OKCupid! The RPG Class Test

Wizard 48% Combativeness, 33% Sneakiness, 64% Intellect, 13% Spirituality

Brilliant! You are a Wizard! Wizards are spells-casters who study powerful arcane magic. While Wizards tend to be pretty fragile, some of those spells can pack quite a punch. Unlike Clerics, Wizards aren’t as good at fixing people as they are at breaking them, so watch where you toss that fireball… Your most distinctive trait is your intelligence. You're probably well learned and logical, if perhaps a bit fragile.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 31% on Combativeness You scored higher than 39% on Sneakiness You scored higher than 34% on Intellect You scored higher than 5% on Spirituality

Link: The RPG Class Test written by MFlowers on OkCupid, home of the The Dating Persona Test