My father and I used to keep a list throughout the year of movies we saw in the theater on the refrigerator with ratings on them. He'd give me crap about seeing more movies than him. But, considering that essentially every weekend I was seeing a movie with him (we'd miss a few weekends in this period due to going to a Cardinal game, or a show at the Fox, or the St. Louis Symphony), I'd go to the movies fairly often with my girlfriend at the time, and once a week my friend Verne and I would ditch class to go see a movie at Crestwood Mall. Until we saw it... A movie that was, to us, just disgustingly unenjoyable. Our weekly skip to the movies was killed dead by Natural Born Killers. I was a little surprised to see it placed only third from the bottom on this list.
I was more surprised that Stargate is my favorite 1994 movie. I really had no idea what would come out on top. Maybe I haven't been clear about this before, but I've been using (a slightly modified) Condorcet method to rank each year of movies. But there were so many movies that I saw at the time and since, either on video or cable that I did enjoy; how did Stargate win? When I saw Stargate for the first time, at Keller 8 Cine; 1) I thought it was one of the most predictable movies I've ever seen, but 2) I really wanted to see a sequel. It was co-opting Erich von Däniken and the rest of the ancient astronaut mini industry of books you'd find in the metaphysical / new-age section of any Waldenbooks, without being tacky. I really wished for a second movie where they went to Atlantis. Other gods in addition to the Egyptians would have been nice to see as well. But, If I had made this list in 1994, not only would it have been a lot shorter. Stargate wouldn't have passed Forest Gump, Pulp Fiction, or Leon. It probably would have been just above the middle.
"Never underestimate your audience. They're generally sensitive, intelligent people who respond positively to quality entertainment." - STARGΛTE SG·1 |
So why so much love now for a truly ridiculous movie? Ridiculous I say? The premise is this; If you find an old safe, and have the first 6 numbers of a 7 number combination, how many experts does it take to open it? But, that's what Alfred Hitchcock would call a "Refrigerator Moment", so it's forgiven. Now, my wife and her brother dig on Stargate, but that's not enough alone. Star Trek The Next Generation is my favorite TV series ever, and that probably helped Generations to the second spot (tied with The Lion King). Heck, Generations isn't even that great, Why didn't Tolian Sorin just get himself a shuttlecraft and one of those thruster suits Spock had in The Motion Picture and fly into the Nexus, save all the people on Veridian 3 the trouble of dying... by the way, if you kill an entire planetary civilization in a movie these days, you don't gewt a pass like Generations or New Hope, we need to see cities crumble and families crushed or engulfed in flame... Go Roland Emmerich on their sorry carbon based bottoms! Say, aside from 2012, didn't he make... Stargate? Stargate got to the top of this list with Ten seasons of clawing it's way into my heart. As much as I loved Richard Dead Anderson, and I still as of the writing of this, I need to watch all of Farscape. But, Ben Browder and Claudia Black joining the show, made SG·1 some serious family time TV viewing. It's a conceptual high tide, and I'm probably not the first person to enjoy the original film more, thanks to the series. So, it's on to the next round for twenty movies from the class of 1994, here's the list of how everyone stacked up in the end.
- Stargate
- (Tie) Star Trek Generations
- (Tie) The Lion King
- Interview with the Vampire
- Pulp Fiction
- Léon
- Forrest Gump
- Clerks
- Maverick
- The Crow
- Mary Shelley's Frankenstein
- True Lies
- The Shawshank Redemption
- Radioland Murders
- Street Fighter
- Ed Wood
- Love Affair
- The Flintstones
- The Hudsucker Proxy
- Timecop
- The Next Karate Kid
- The Shadow
- Speechless
- The Paper
- Quiz Show
- The Mask
- Reality Bites
- Richie Rich
- Godzilla vs. Space Godzilla
- Major League II
- Naked Gun 33⅓: The Final Insult
- Threesome
- Three Colors: Red
- Heavenly Creatures
- Color of Night
- Speed
- The Ref
- I.Q.
- Bad Girls
- Highlander III: The Final Dimension
- Nobody's Fool
- Sirens
- The Madness of King George
- Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
- Backbeat
- Mixed Nuts
- Three Colors: White
- Africa: The Serengeti
- Lightning Jack
- Greedy
- Cobb
- With Honors
- The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
- Disclosure
- Guarding Tess
- Police Academy: Mission to Moscow
- North
- Clear and Present Danger
- Legends of the Fall
- Nell
- Little Women
- The Getaway
- Blown Away
- Dream Lover
- The Scout
- Four Weddings and a Funeral
- No Escape
- The Specialist
- Shallow Grave
- The Return of Jafar
- City Slickers II: The Legend of Curly's Gold
- On Deadly Ground
- Renaissance Man
- Wes Craven's New Nightmare
- The Chase
- I Love Trouble
- Only You
- Wyatt Earp
- Terminal Velocity
- Immortal Beloved
- Double Dragon
- Gunmen
- Wolf
- Black Beauty
- The Santa Clause
- The Cowboy Way
- Intersection
- Miracle on 34th Street
- Exit to Eden
- Lassie
- The Jungle Book
- The Client
- Beverly Hills Cop III
- Drop Zone
- It Could Happen To You
- The Puppet Masters
- Junior
- Muriel's Wedding
- The Little Rascals
- Angels in the Outfield
- When a Man Loves a Woman
- The Swan Princess
- Baby's Day Out
- Serial Mom
- A Troll in Central Park
- My Girl 2
- PCU
- Natural Born Killers
- Dumb and Dumber
- It's Pat
"This page would look so much cooler if I were at the top" -- Pulp Fiction Movie poster, squatting here in it's own coolness protesting the movies loss. |
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