I'm making the most definitive list of favorite movies ever.

For every year, I'm listing every movie I've seen and compare them all to each other asking one question; Which movie do I like more. Movies that score in the 80th percentile or higher, advance to the next round: Favorite of the Decade. After each Decade is done, an All Time list will be formed.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Movie: Transformers

Oh..... wow, I soooooo didn't hate this movie, I think it's love, but who want's to rush into a huge commitment like that. This is a movie that is a 5out of 5 and guilty of not being an 8 out of 5. It's the Mona Lisa holding a Cocktail glass or having a yellow umbrella in the background. It's not Episode I.

I won't bitch about flames on Optimus... I loved the way he looked. Fanboys who bitched about the flames or other small things 'destroying Prime or their Childhood, don't forget that Hasbro at one point tuned him into Optimus Primal and he was originally a bat, a cheap stupid bat. So, a paint job will not kill yer childhood.

Why wasn't this movie more mythic, more character driven, why couldn't the action had less blurry moving camera blur? Are all women in their universe former Victoria secret models?

Oh, if I have spoilers... if you haven't seen the movie already, you don't care enough about Transformers to feel it spoils anything.

Let's see..... quickie thoughts....

Megatron tosses a car. That's just one instance of human life being piss in this movie, the Decepticons tear through people like a natural disaster, and human life has never felt cheaper. Buckets of dead... and if you tear through a bus, Prime will CUT YOUR HEAD OFF!

Captain or Sargent Lennox... The guy with the baby, should have been named Fairborne, and his daughter should have been named Marissa. Though I'm now cool with the Sam Mikela thing for the most part, they wasted about a billion chances in this movie to make G.I. Joe a Transformers spinoff.

They seeded so many great things in this for the BEST Sequels EVER....

Galvatron, We'll all be happy if he doesn't go by Megatron anymore. and killing Starscream would be nice, but Starscream has to become leader the moment before his murder. SO MAKE HIM GALVATRON!!!!

Jetfire, who says Megatron came to earth alone?

Quintessons: Damn, they'd be like the aliens in the 2001 series, throwing cosmic geometry everywhere, but instead of spreading sapience they're spreading chaos, which is a perfect way of creating demand for their products!

Dinobots: Chuck that fragment of the Allspark, which can probably become another Allspark, onto some Animatronic dinosaurs, then have Grimlock fighting Prime until Grimlock realizes he's not evil.

Bruticus: Starscream should raise his own army, and announce himself their supreme commander, then, well, I refer back to the Galvatron thing.

This was in no way disappointing, but I wish they'd realize what they have here. Transformers could have been a holy trilogy. They're off on the wrong foot for it to be up with Rings and Star Wars, but they're close, and some out of the park sequels could put transformers in the pantheon, rather than in the loser set of Spider-Man (Third one blew it...) Matrix (take after Jaws, never acknowledge your sequels), and Pirates (You're not as bad off as some other trilogies, time will tell if you join the Pantheon, you're in trilogy purgatory with "The Prequel Trilogy" and The Godfather...)

So Bay, and Spielberg, do you want to make a series of films that have good opening days, or do you want a series so LOVED that we'll need to buy a boxed set for every new format down the road... So even 100 years from now, "Oooo, Transformers Trilogy Memory Crystals, 11,000 Dollars at Best Circuit Buy City - Mart, those are a MUST!!!"

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