Don't be a geek. Society says geeks don't get laid.
Be normal and get married. (Society says married guys don't get laid...)
Whaaa?
Oh WAIT.... Now Dave Letterman has a Top 10 List saying Star Wars fans are LOOSERS!!!
I have Answers!!!
Letterman Top Ten - Questions 2 Ask Yourself Before Camping Out To See Star Wars
10. Why don't I have anything better to do?
Please also ask that of the MILLIONS of people who went to see the Pope's Funeral, the stain on that Chicago underpass, any proffessional sport, any political rally, everyone surfing the internet or even watching late night television. We're all people, looking for something to do on a boring ball of wet dirt. David Letterman should appreciate the money he's made from breaking up the monotiny of life!
9. How many Wookies does my tent sleep?
My tent isn't secure to put into a tree, Wookies should provide their own tent.
8. Will it be more fun than when I camped out to see Miss Congeniality 2?
Yes, you won't be so alone. ($3,055,304 opening day, on 3,183 screens, that's $960 per screen that day... so like less than 2 dozen were in the theatre you saw it in... )
7. Exaclty when did I give up on doing anything meaningful with my life?
After you did Dave, I have a gap in my teeth too, but the posting for reading top ten lists is filled.
6. Will I be teased by roving gangs of Trekkies?
Only if we call the Trekers Trekkies.
5. If I use all my vacation days now, how will I take that trip to ice plant Hoth?
Well... the "Hoth" scenes were filmed in Norway. You CAN go there.... "Finse 1222"
The Hotel, is now a six star resort, PROUD that Empire was filmed there.
4. Does Starbucks let guys dressed as Galactic Bounty Hunters use their bathroom?
The second of Starbucks 6 guiding principles on their mission statement is "Embrace diversity as an essential component in the way we do business." That means yes, they're more open minded than YOU!
3. I wonder how many other guys on line are names 'Shecky'?
So what that Shecky Greene guest hosted the Tonight Show... don't drag Star Wars into it!
2. Should I just pay the extra dollar and use moviefone?
Actually, I did.
1. If I had a girlfriend what would she think?
If I had a girlfriend, I would be castrated and penectomized by my wife.
I have learned one thing from this. Don't wait in any line to ever see David Letterman. It's not that I want to be as whining as everyone else in this pathetic culture has become. But unless it involves alchohol in this country... you're not one of the cool people. In college they tell you to write at a fourth grade reading level. The reason is apparent, emotionally, none of us ever got out of the fourth grade. I'm right there with everyone else here... In the fourth grade I loved Star Wars and Transformers, and I'm damn proud to still love 'em. This whole country would be a lot better if you didn't think your childhood was something you had to forcibly sever from your life. Kepp what you enjoyed about it, and keep in mind how stupid you were a great deal of the time...
You can make fun of Star Wars / Trek / Comic Book / Sci-Fi Geeks when you make fun of ALL GEEKS!!!!! Sports Geeks, God Geeks, Jesus Geeks, Sex Geeks, Car Geeks, Beer Geeks... ALL OF THEM!!!!
shoe geeks, news geeks, beltway geeks, trivia geeks, home improvement geeks (junkies), camera geeks, pet geeks, diet geeks, excercise geeks.... there is nothing that anyone can enjoy and not be a geek about it!
I live in a culture of idiots. I can't go a day without hearing shit like this... or about the culture wars. The culture wars get to pick up guns and bombs and start drawing lines in the sand and killing each other, raping the women and killing the children, leaving burnt cities behind them. If the thought of that turns your stomach, don't participate in the "Culture wars"... If, you are willing to die and moreover kill over shit like Howard Stern, put yourself in an orange jumpsuit and swim to Gauntanamo Bay. America has a place for your kind.
1 comment:
right on my man
call it as it is!
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